By Charles Caruso
Spring is a fraud. People get all excited about a nice day in April because it’s so rare.
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Did Shakespeare talk Shakespeare when he was out with the boys?
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No one should have guns except the army and police—as in the civilized countries.
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The trees are waiting for spring’s green mist.
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What kind of religion portrays its founder nailed to a cross? Put him on a throne for Christ’s sake.
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Nothing spoils a romantic moment like a piece of dental floss on the rug.
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For a rainy day: Books, booze and videooze.
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Get mad, not sad. Anger is better than depression.
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Why does the chicken feed never stop? Because life is 90 percent chicken feed.
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The first day of spring is when the girls take their coats off.
